Too Smart to Live Like This

One of the things I’ll be working on through this is my health, mainly my weight and general fitness.

When I grew up, back when mom was cooking my meals, I was skinny. I was really underweight. I was a geeky, unathletic, acne ridden nerd. I played no sports. I had no muscle to speak of.

The day that I graduated High School in June of 1987 I had a doctor’s appointment in the morning as part of my preparations for attending college in the fall. That day, in shorts and a t-shirt, I weighed 135lbs. At 18 I was fully grown, so then, as now, I’m just a hair short of six feet tall. For those of you metric minded out there, that’s 1.8 meters tall and 61kg. Or 4 cubits and 9.6 stone if you’re so inclined.

When I was unleashed into a dorm situation late that August, and began living somewhere that I had some leeway in choosing what I ate, the lack of any throttle on candy and Mountain Dew, not to mention the introduction of Alcohol, Cards, Alcohol, and 3am trips to Taco Bell (washed down with alcohol), my poor body began to have to deal with a radically different diet. They talk of incoming college students gaining the “Freshman 15″. By Christmas break I’d gained “The Freshman 35.”

I ended up hovering around 180 for a long time, mostly because I was working jobs that were, while not physical, at least kept me mobile. I’d spend 10 hours a day on my feet working as a manager of a retail store, or spend 8 hours as an on-site repair person, carrying computer equipment out to businesses.

At some point in the mid 90s I got a desk job, at first just Data Entry. All my jobs since have been me spending 8+ hours a day with my ass planted in an office chair wiggling my fingers. I can trace the start of my serious weight gain to just about that point.

So the tale of the tape right now is that I’m six feet tall and weigh 334lbs (151.5kg). If you’re paying attention that’s right at 200lbs gained in 21 years, since the day of my graduation.

I’m afflicted by the normal fat-guy ailments. Sleep Apnea, fatigue, aching joints. In 2002 I managed to sprain both my ankles at the same time (I don’t recommend it) and the right one never really healed fully. If I have to stand for a long time, or walk a long distance, it will begin to throb.

And don’t forget, when this started, I was a 135lb weakling. I know a few “big fat guys” who are, without question, the strongest men I know. They’re all former football players who “let themselves go”. I don’t have the benefit of a large muscle mass. My weight is all fat. Any muscle mass over what I had in ‘87 is what my body grew to compensate for having to carry more weight around.

All this has to change. I need to drop considerable weight, and build some corresponding muscle mass. I need to increase my endurance, so I can walk up the stairs without being winded. I need to come up with reasonable meal plans, not just for myself, but for my family.

I’m too smart to be this unhealthy.